Be Here With Me
by Oberon Sin
Summary: Cloud couldn't forgive himself for letting those he loved most die, but when the opportunity came to choosing life or death for a certain silverhaired brat, he makes what he considers to be a selfish decision. Can he really save Kadaj from himself?
1. Prologue

**Prologue**

Cloud awoke with a start. His body tensed and his senses alert, searching for any sign of movement. _Where am I? How did I get here?_ He thought for a moment. Something warm stirred beside him, clearing the cobwebs in his head and he remembered. The head was pillowed against his chest and Cloud ran a hand through the impossibly soft tresses of hair. The arm draped over his waist tightened its grip before relaxing again.

He laid back into the pillow and stared at the gloomy ceiling, street lights filtered through the curtains and distant night sounds gave him a sense of tranquillity. He wasn't in Midgar anymore, haven't been for a while. This was Costa del Sol, the land of sunshine, salt water, tanning lotion and endless parties. This was truly the city that never sleeps, more so than even Midgar. But Cloud wasn't here for the sunshine or the parties, he wasn't even here for the tan, though he could probably do with one. He was here for…hmm, he wasn't sure why he was here apart from the fact that it was away from Midgar and he did own the former Shinra mansion.

Still fiddling with the soft hair, he thought back to how he got here. It felt like a long time ago, felt like an age. Maybe even another life time, but curiously, it had only taken such a short time for him to reach his current position. Just remembering felt as though he could lose what he has now. Loss, it's a familiar experience for him, he has lost too much to too many things for too little reason. But this wasn't a loss. It was a gamble he had won, against high odds mind you, and a win is a win. He had learned to take small miracles when offered without questioning if he really deserved it. Maybe he had finally forgiven himself. The green-eyed girl danced and smiled in his mind's eye, her soft voice whispered incoherent words of love and affection in his ears.

_Why don't you forgive yourself already, Cloud._ She had asked him when he used to still see her. Had he seen her again, he would've told her he has, though he had the feeling she already knew. Letting the memories unfold, Cloud closed his eyes and remembered.

(A.N) So, prologue is short huh? I suppose that's what prologues are. Anyway, tell me what anyone thinks, I don't think I'm on par with some of the other writers here.


	2. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own it. **

**Chapter 1: A lifetime Ago**

_Some time ago…_

"Niisan…"

He had fought again, for the people, his friends and the planet. Cloud was once again pushed into a fight that would end up costing something he wasn't willing to give up. He had been sick of the hero role, and he's still sick of it. It was bad enough that he had to kill Him again but now he was holding a dying boy who had been nothing but a puppet. Means to an end, just like he once were.

"Kadaj."

Drained of his cold arrogance, contempt and uncontrollable rage, Kadaj was nothing but a 17 years old brat. Frail and alone in a world where there were already too many orphans. Cloud choked back the guilt that threatened to swallow him and brushed a strand of silver hair from the pale forehead.

It was ironic, he had saved the planet along with its vast population twice from JENOVA, yet he could do nothing for a child who deserved a real life more than anything. His heart cried at the injustice leaving his breath in gasps and his chest heaving.

But there was something he could do. A gamble, if lost, could mean destruction for everything he had tried to save. _Dammit, why can't I be selfish just this once!_ Cloud clenched his teeth and made his decision. He had lost Zack, Aerith and Sephiroth. This time, he refused to lose another one to her. JENOVA. Cloud could almost hear her metallic voice grinding against his nerves, reprimanding him for not living up to her will.

Cloud gathered Kadaj into his arms and lifted the slender body up, he could feel the sticky warmth soaking through his top and turning uncomfortably cold. Above them, Sierra was preparing to land and Cloud hoped those closest around him would understand his actions.

The cargo hold opened up slowly to reveal Tifa running towards him. She stopped suddenly when she saw the bundle clad in black leather in his arms. Cloud had expected this, and slowly walked into the ship. Tifa opened her mouth but faltered. What could she say? Two years ago, she thought she had seen the last of those who bore the mark of JENOVA, but two days ago, they had come back and now, Cloud was carrying one in his arms.

_He has his reasons. And I trust him._ Carefully, Tifa approached the closest thing she has to family and gave her most understanding nod. She could see the relief wash over the glowing blue eyes and told herself she had made the right decision. _But the consequences…_

"Is…" she took a deep breath before continuing. "Is he okay?"

"I don't know, He's bleeding." He suddenly doubted himself. Tifa is always going to be Tifa, she would never say or do anything she thought might hurt him, but this was probably asking for too much from her. Sephiroth had killed her father and destroyed her home. But asking her to help save someone who could potentially destroy what remained of her world was…

As though she could read his thoughts. Tifa smiled.

"He's just a boy." She muttered before pulling him up into the cargo hold. The gates closed and the rest of the crew showed up. Their surprise, shock and even the look of betrayal flew across their faces and a stormy silence swept over the entire ship.

"What the hell is he doing here?" Said Barrett finally, unable to bear the silence any longer.

"We'll talk about this later," Tifa glared at the mean looking softie. "Let's get him into the cabins." She looked at Cloud. Her soft chocolate eyes sparkling with pity.

The crew quarters were comfortable enough, bunk beds were arranged neatly on either side complete with a small night table per bed. They had put Kadaj on the closest bed, doing whatever they can to make him more comfortable. Now with the help with the medical aide on board, Tifa removed the tight-fitting leather armour and gasped. Cloud watched from a corner out of the way. These were the wounds he had inflicted on Sephiroth, now Kadaj was bearing the consequences.

With trained hands, Tifa had quickly bandaged the shallower cuts and stitched up the deeper ones. Hours later, she finally took a breath, sat down and bandaged Cloud's injured shoulder in silence. The Sierra hadn't moved but it had now taken off towards Edge. She had so many questions that she wanted to ask but couldn't. Tifa knew very well that Cloud would talk about it when he was ready. There really wasn't any point in asking him anything until he was sure what he wanted to say. Sighing inwardly, she wandered how long they're going to be just friends. _At least he stayed with me…if only for a short while._ He had stayed with her after the last battle, but somehow, Tifa had the feeling he only stayed because there was no where else he could go without thinking about Aerith. Still, she couldn't help but hope for the day when he came home, for her.


	3. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own it.**

**Chapter 2: Fight Me But Don't Leave Me**

Kadaj had obviously fallen into an uneasy sleep. Tears trailed down the side of his face, occasionally muttering words then crying out aloud only to fall back to sleep again. The rest of Avalanche remained on deck, unsure if they should intrude. Only Vincent seemed to be unconcerned and perched himself on the main deck hidden in a dark corner.

Not long later, they had landed on the outskirts of Edge. The destruction of Bahamut Sin had caused damage to the city centre but thankfully left residential areas along with 7th Heaven untouched. As the ship landed, Kadaj had awoke suddenly. He looked around frantically like a cornered animal before reaching out to Cloud and sobbed into whatever he could grab that was Niisan.

Cloud knew what the boy had dreamt about. He once had the same dreams of JENOVA, she came with fiery arms, wolf's smile and crocodile tears. He let the boy sob into his chest and felt his heart tighten. The slender frame shook every few minutes before slowly calming down and falling asleep again. Now Kadaj was lying in Cloud's old bed. They had stripped off the remaining armour and changed him into a pair of old shorts.

"Tifa." Cloud pulled her aside. She looked bleary-eyed and allowed herself to be led.

"I need to get Fenrir back. Could you..?" He cast a glance at the sleeping form. A hand was on his arm and he looked into the chocolate pools.

"Sure. You'll be back soon, ne?" She tried to smile and be cheerful but she couldn't shake the anxiety from her body.

He didn't reply but nodded and disappeared through the door. She heard his and Cid's voice before the front door shut quietly. Marlene and Denzel were next door clinging onto Barrett leaving the rest of the group in the bar and her with a psychotic brat. She shook her head and wondered how she managed to get the short end of the stick every time.

She sat down on the edge of the bed and studied the unconscious boy. His silvery brows furrowed and unfurrowed themselves, sweat beaded on his pale skin. She could see his eyes move under the closed lids and felt sorry for him all of a sudden. He was so young. Probably haven't experienced much during his short life apart from torment, betrayal and pain which all got rolled up into a big ball of uncontrollable rage.

With a cold towel, Tifa dabbed at the sweat and sighed again. She hoped Cloud would be back soon. Tifa doubted Kadaj would stay calm if he had woke up without seeing his Niisan around. They could probably handle him in his current state, but Tifa really didn't feel like rebuilding her bar any time soon. Besides, there were children around, she didn't want them caught in the cross fire.

Darkness was coming quickly, the angel outside the window cast its long shadow across the empty street. Blemishes on the stone figure made it look like a weeping saint, pitying the world of men and monsters alike. Tifa wandered if the planet still cried, if the wound would ever heal. If the wound in her own heart would heal. For the last two years, she thought she could forget it all and leave it behind, but the past always seems to catch up to her. Even after her father's death and the destruction of her home town, Tifa thought she could forget when she woke up in a Midgar hospital. But it never ends, does it? Joining Avalanche had made sure the past would come back in the form of Cloud.

_Did we lose to our memories?_ She had asked him that, not so long ago. She hadn't been looking for an answer, not that she received one either. It was only to vocalise what she had suspected all along. It wasn't only Cloud who had been living in the past, everyone in Avalanche had including herself. When would she stop thinking about the past and move forward. It's true she had made progress by caring for the orphans, it had been a step forward but she was still in the past wasn't she? Whenever trouble came calling, she would wait for Cloud to come and save her. That hope alone had sealed her fate bringing it all back to the beginning. To the water tower. Had Cloud never intended to leave home then she would never have asked for the promise and maybe the tragedy that followed could have been avoided.

No, it would have happened either way. Sephiroth would have still come to Nibelheim with or without Cloud. His presence merely ensured her own survival. But her survival had meant the lives of thousands of people who died when Sector 7 plate fell. But Avalanche already existed before she came so every life lost so far would not have been prevented regardless of herself. Tifa knew she was thinking in circles but couldn't stop. She could take the blame away from herself but it was just a lie to sate her guilt for a fleeting moment. It always comes back…

Deep in her thoughts, Tifa failed to notice the green cat eyes staring at her through dark eyelashes, fascinated by the train of emotions running across her visage. Kadaj was awake and hoped Tifa wouldn't notice. He had been interested in the 'fighting girl' since the moment Loz had told him about her.

_Hmm…Loz…Yazoo._ He wandered if his brothers were still alive. Well, alive in the sense that they are still walking on the surface of the planet rather than swimming around in the life stream. Their existence couldn't be counted as being alive. Their sole purpose was to act as a vessel between JENOVA and the physical world and their livelihood depended on mother. He didn't want to think about these things, Tifa was a much better thing to study right now. He would ignore mother, Kadaj had only begun to feel alive, even if it felt sore all over.

Kadaj was vaguely aware of something between Tifa and Niisan. He had felt it in the way she looked at him and when she touched him. A longing carefully guarded and held at bay. He wasn't sure how to describe it but it was interesting nonetheless. He looked around the room. _Where is Niisan? _Cloud was nowhere to be seen in the room. _Niisan?_ Fear seized him. _Niisan had left me!_ He shot up in his bed, ignoring the sensation of something ripping near his chest.

Tifa jumped off the bed in surprise. She immediately took a fighting stance, her clenched fists raised in front of her and her eyes gauged his weakness. But Kadaj didn't go any further then the bed. He looked down at the bandages wrapped around his torso and winced. Dark red liquid, his life force were seeping through the clean wrapping from where he had ripped the stitching.

"Niisan." He cried out but his voice was cracked and dry.

"Don't move." Kadaj jerked his head in her direction. He lowered his head and glared at her. His mouth twitched and turned into a scowl. Something deadly was brewing in his head. Something Tifa didn't want to think about.

"Nissan. What have you done to him? What have you done to Souba?" He demanded, logic was slipping from his grasp, rage was consuming him again. The fighting girl. She was the reason Niisan had left him. Niisan didn't want the fighting girl to be hurt again that's why he left him. _I would've gone with you Niisan, why didn't you take me?_ He was almost choking on his own grief but none of it made it to his face.

"You're the one who lost your own weapon. Don't blame it on anyone else." Tifa didn't want to tell him Cloud would be back. She didn't want to show her fear or her dependence on Cloud so she stayed quiet and watched the boy.

"Well then," he pulled the blanket aside, "I don't need Souba anyway." His tone was cocky. _Like a teenage boy._ Kadaj swung his legs off the bed and stood up, a wave of dizziness quickly swept over his body. The fighting girl would have noticed that and probably use it to her advantage. He felt a surge of power from his left arm travelling through his blood taking on a dull glow which reached his hand. _Materia._ It was still embedded within him wasn't it. He smirked at her, noticing the change in her composure. He clenched his fist and held on to the energy. Waiting for it to concentrate before unleashing his hold.

"Stop!" _Niisan!_ He forgot about the materia. Anger quickly turned to happiness. The forgotten energy shot through the floor under his feet. A loud curse was heard from down stairs in the bar. Someone who sounded suspiciously like Cid.

Kadaj rushed across the small room and jumped on the figure that appeared at the door. Strong but slender arms were wrapped around Cloud's waist and buried a silver head against his chest. Cloud looked at the attached body for a moment in hesitation before dropping the twin blades from his hand and gingerly embraced his moody charge, who was apparently his brother.

Tifa stood and watched the scene transpire in front of her. Finding it hard to believe how the psychotic brat had gone from decidedly angry to being sweet as pie in the matter of seconds. _Well, we do call him the psychotic brat. _

"Niisan, I thought you had left without me. I was so scared but now you're back." The teenager was practically purring into him. Kadaj transfixed his green eyes on the glint on the floor. He jerked himself away from the embrace and knelt down.

"Souba…" He ran a bare finger across the smooth metal with delight. He grasped his left hand around the familiar hilt and laughed.

"Kadaj." Cloud's voice broke through the daze. Kadaj blinked twice and looked up into blue mako eyes.

"Ne Niisan, you found it for me, right?" Kadaj stood up, holding onto the twin blades.

"Well…" Cloud was looking decidedly uncomfortable.

"You came back and you came with a present." He held the blade out in front of himself horizontally and studied the flawless make. Footsteps rumbled up the hallway, revealing Avalanche in emergency status. They stopped when they saw Cloud next to Kadaj but lunged at the boy when they saw the glint of metal in his hands.

Kadaj flipped backwards and landed on his feet gracefully. Souba gleamed and was held out in front of the boy in a familiar stance. Both sides stayed still. Each waiting for the other to make the first move with Cloud caught in no man's land. He sighed inward. _Negotiation is definitely not my strong point._ He thought about the situation and decided it was probably better to calm Kadaj down since there was only one of him.

Cloud took a step towards the 17 years old.

"Kadaj, put Souba down. No one is going to hurt you."

"What? I'd be damned if I **don't** hurt him!" Barrett bellowed from behind. Cloud clenched his teeth in annoyance. Barrett always knew how to make a bad situation into a worse one. Surprisingly though, Kadaj did as he asked. He lowered his blade and stood like a child caught in an act of cookie stealing.

"Niisan! They started it. I was only admiring Souba." Kadaj furrowed his brows, crossed his arms, still clenching Souba and pouted. Cloud couldn't help but smile a little as he watched Kadaj act his age.

"Fine! Take it. I don't need it anyway." Kadaj threw the blade at Cloud who caught it deftly out of the air. The boy pouted again before jumping into the bed and pulled the sheets over his head. They all stood, frozen while their brains worked to grasp the situation. Cloud rubbed his eyes and felt a headache coming on. His body was aching and fatigued. He needed some sleep. Tifa walked over to the doorway and dragged Barrett out the door. The remaining group followed her lead without question and closed the door behind them.

Cloud looked at the boy on his bed and sighed. He knew the confrontation like today would happen again. But he can't be here all the time. One day, one side is going to snap and it would be all over. He dragged a chair over to the bed and sat down. Finally allowing himself to relax a little. Kadaj turned towards him and pulled the sheet of his head, fluffing the smooth silver.

"Niisan. I did the right thing. Right? It's want you wanted me to do, ne?" Cloud smiled wearily.

"Yeah. You did the right thing, Kadaj." He watched as Kadaj broke into a gentle smile. So contrasting to the cold snarl he was wearing not so long ago. Sleep was pulling him in. Dragging him in its delicate net into her cool embrace. He tilted his head back and gave into it. He never saw or felt Kadaj pulling off his own blanket and draping it over him.


	4. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters used and abused.

**AN: Hmmm, haven't updated in donkey's years. Sorry to anyone who is actually interested, but studying is hard. Anyway, it appears this story is turning into a somewhat BL thing. So, if you are really offended by this, please tune out and don't report me! However, I have to say there is a bit (perhaps a big bit) of CloTi action so that may satisfy those that prefer the other way. Please, read and review, don't report me! **

** Chapter Warning: Nothing offensive!  
**

**Chapter 3: His Reasons and His Wants.**

Tifa paced across the empty bar, glancing to the rest of her friends scattered around the room. Vincent, as per usual, was half hidden in a corner. Nanaki was sprawled across an old rug. Cait Sith leaned his, or her, furry body against a stool. Yuffie sat on a bar stool playing with her oversized shuriken while Cid and Barrett were digging into her merchandise. _Running a bar with alcoholic friends was a really bad idea._

"Tifa?" Yuffie called out with a small voice. Though the girl could trade insult with style, she was still shy around people who she actually liked. Tifa stopped her pacing and looked at the Wutai heiress.

"I need to get the children back to Wutai. The parents are waiting for them." She fiddled with her armlet and dipped her head. Hoping Tifa wouldn't take this as an abandonment. Tifa walked over to the stool and put her hand around the young girl's shoulders.

"Go, Yuffie. The children needs to see their parents." She smiled encouragingly and watched the girl look up in relief. The self-proclaimed ninja hopped off the stool yelled at Cid.

"Hey old man!" Cid looked up, gnashing his cigarette between his teeth. "Yeah, you with the cancer stick. Give me a ride back to Wutai!"

"WHAT? Why you little $&(&$#)&!" But he stood up and slammed back the rest of his drink.

"I'll be back once I drop of the other brat." Cid waved a hand and strode out the door, followed by the Wutai children and Yuffie. A string of profanity could still be heard even after they disappeared from view.

"Well. I'm gonna go to bed. I can't handle this much more." Barrett announced from behind the bar. Tifa considered his words and agreed with him for once. She thought about bed arrangement in her head and decided to put Barrett up in her room, she would share with Marlene and Denzel. Nanaki was looking comfortable on the floor and Cait Sith was a robot. That leaves Vincent.

As though on cue, Vincent emerged from the corner and headed towards the door.

"I will be back in the morning." He muttered without looking back.

"You know the phone seller is closed at this time of the night!" Barrett called out after him, sounding mighty proud of his joke.

"Hmm, guess someone still has a carrot stuck up their ass." The large man said to himself over the rim of his glass.

After Marlene and Denzel were herded off to bed, Barrett looked at Tifa. She had never seen the big man looking so serious as he did now. Tifa braced herself. If Barrett got serious, then the situation was probably really, really bad.

"You know psycho kid can't stay here right?" He stared at her.

"I know. But Barrett, Cloud needs this."

"Yeah. I know. I'm always gonna be there for his blonde spiky ass but why does it have to be the psycho kid?" Tifa threw her arms up in frustration. She didn't know either but she can wait. She knew it was stupid but she could wait for Cloud as long as he needed but Barrett was not known for his patience.

"Cloud has his own reasons. I… I don't know either but we have to trust him like we always did. He just needs to do something for himself." _Yeah, he needs this and I need to support him._ Tifa convinced herself, but wandered briefly if she was merely saying that because there was something here that she didn't want to admit.

"We'll see. But if the psycho kid from upstairs tries anything, I'll be the first to fry his JENOVA ass!" Barrett left and disappeared into Tifa's room. She heard the strain of bed springs and sighed. _We'll see. I hope you're wrong Barrett._

"Yo psycho kid! Get your puny, girly ass down here!" Came a roar. Kadaj emerged, dressed in what he had called the 'Niisan look', which basically considered of a sleeveless knit shirt from Niisan's own extensive collection, black pants and his own combat boots.

It's been a week since he had first arrived in 7th Heaven. Half of it was spent in bed nursing his various cuts and bruises and the other half was spent looking normal. They had dressed him in normal clothes but nothing could be done about the hair and his eyes. Customers always stared at him and Kadaj hadn't figured out why they stared. One could be the fact that he looked like the kid who wanted to destroy the planet and the other reason could be because they hadn't figured out if he was a boy or a girl.

Kadaj remembered the first time an old man told him he was a pretty girl and should wear a dress. He was just about to crack the man's head open with the hilt of Souba, _the scum doesn't deserve the blade, _when Cloud dragged him out of the bar and explained to him the effects of alcohol on human judgement.

Of course the run-ins with Barrett and Cid had increased steadily. The older men seemed to pick fights with him over every little thing from the last of Tifa's baked potatoes to first dibs on Tifa's cake dough. _Strange,_ he thought, _every fight was over Tifa's cooking._ He stomped down the stairs and wandered what Barrett wanted to pick a fight over now.

As expected, the large man glared from the bottom of the stair case with his hands on his hips. _Yep, food fight._ He thought miserably. The fights had been fun to start off with but now it was becoming annoying. Kadaj had better things to do, such as looking through Niisan's photo albums, than entertaining big mean grunts who ate enough to feed an army.

"What!" He snapped at the glaring man.

"Where the hell did the last slice of pudding go?"

"How would I know?"

"Because your puny ass probably ate it!"

_That's it. I don't care what Niisan says, I'm teaching the giant baboon a lesson!_ Kadaj hopped down the stairs and stared right at Barrett. He could see a murderous rage brewing behind the dark eyes. Instead of turning on his heels and ignoring the look, Kadaj smirked with contempt in retaliation.

"What are you going to do? Kick my ass?" He fluttered his eye lashes and feigned distress. The smirk quickly dissolved into a snarl. He rested his finger on the hilt of Souba, waiting for the big man to change into his gun arm. A week out of commission and Kadaj had been aching for a fight.

"Stop it! Both of you!" Tifa tore the glaring competition and wedged herself between them. Kadaj had come to understand that Tifa, formerly known as the fighting girl, was nice. Well, listening and doing what she asked obviously made Niisan happy so Kadaj did it. He took a step back and calmed himself. Taking deep breath of air made the red haze fade from his vision.

"Barrett, you should know better! You're three times his age but you're behaving like a delinquent!" Tifa poked a stiff finger in Barrett's large chest. She knew Barrett would never have risked a fight but Kadaj was as unpredictable as they come.

"I'll be upstairs waiting for Niisan." Kadaj didn't wait to be scolded and stomped up the stairs. _Why can't Niisan and I live somewhere else! I don't care about anyone else… well, Yazoo and Loz… if they're still alive. But I don't care about the rest of the people here. Why isn't Niisan back yet?_

Kadaj stared out the small window and perked up his ears, waiting for the familiar roar of Fenrir turning off the high way. He hasn't completely recovered, especially the stitches he had tore the first night. They would probably leave a scar but it would be okay. Because Niisan has scar too, left by Him. He stretched out on the bed and stared at the blank ceiling. Kadaj closed his eyes after a while and recalled his favourite face before sleep unexpectedly took him.

"I can't do this anymore, Barrett. You can't keep pushing him." Tifa hated pleading but she had to. "Think for Marlene, for Denzel. I don't want them to get hurt!" Barrett looked down at his thick boots and thought for a moment.

"I'm gonna take Marlene and Denzel to North Corel for a while. After this whole thing blows over." Tifa felt a sudden drop in her stomach. She had liked having the kids around, they made her feel as though she still had a family. But it's probably the right thing to do. As long as one side leaves then things will blow over pretty quick.

"When are you leaving?" She fiddled with the apron she was wearing.

"Tomorrow morning. I've talked to Cid, he wants to go back to Rocket Town, we'll drop Nanaki and Cait Sith at the Canyon and me at North Corel." Tifa stood silent.

"Sorry girl. I've got to think for the kids." He looked at her apologetically, and put a hand on her shoulder.

"Don't be Barrett, it's the right thing to do." Tifa turned away, not wanting the big man to see the tears that were welling in her eyes. Tifa knew she would only be crying out of self-pity. _Don't cry. You promised._ With the children gone and Cloud spending most of his time with Kadaj, she knew she'd be and feel alone. Pushing the thoughts out of her head, Tifa went back to cooking. _Guess this will be the last night._


	5. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: Chance to Dream, Hope and Let Go**

"He can't stay here. You know that." Said Vincent Valentine. He was as detached and impersonal as ever, sitting next to Cloud. The Forgotten Forest sparkled, catching light from fireflies on their white barks. The whole place have a surreal and calming feel to it. Cloud had asked Vincent to meet him here. He needed confirmation on something that he knew only Vincent could give.

He had just received the answer he was looking for. It's been a week since Kadaj came to them not as an opponent. He had healed up and tried to blend in but he was still JENOVA's will. Cloud knew the consequences but wasn't sure what he could do now. He couldn't talk to Tifa, he knew that, she would just get hurt if he told her of his plans. But Cloud knew he had to do something, he knew he had to go.

"I know." He replied flatly. Now that the decision was made, he thought about where he could take Kadaj. Icicle Town was too cold, its also too close to the Northern Crater and Gaea's Cliff. Rocket Town, Wutai and Cosmo Canyon and North Corel were definitely out too. Junon wasn't good either, too many Shinra memories and Reeve lived there now. Nibelheim was never considered which leaves Kalm and Costa del Sol. E_lmyra lives in Kalm. _So Costa del Sol was it. Didn't he own that mansion there?

Vincent shifted off the ground, pulling Cloud out of his thoughts. He brushed himself off gracefully and crossed his arms.

"Are you going to tell her?" Cloud felt something tighten in his chest. The question had been floating around in his head for a while. He just didn't think he'd have to answer it, but he couldn't dodge it now. Especially when it was Vincent asking.

"I don't know." And he didn't. It seemed that telling or not telling Tifa wouldn't make a difference to her reaction. She'd feel left behind either way. Tifa had been there for him through everything. Even after the final battle with Sephiroth, she had been there waiting for him by the rocks. Tifa risked her life to wait for him and all he had said was how he knew he could see Aerith in the Promised Land. Tifa never even frowned, she had put her arms around him and told him he was right. _I owe her too much._

"When have you planned to leave and where will you settle down?" Cloud looked up and saw the rubies glow. Vincent had the same Mako glow in his eyes, they were just red.

"I'm taking Kadaj tonight, we'll probably go to Costa del Sol. Tifa… she'll understand." He's lied to himself before about her feelings, he was doing it again. Cloud kicked himself mentally and silently promised one day he'll make up for it all. He kicked himself again for making false promises. Cloud knew what Tifa wanted, he just wasn't sure if he could give it. _Running away again, Cloud Strife?_

"hmm. You know how to reach me, should you need anything."

"Take care of her. For me." Cloud heard the sound of clothes fluttering in the wind. He turned and found Vincent gone. All that remained that ever suggested his presence was the slight indent on the ground next to him but he knew Vincent had heard his request. Looking around the last time, Cloud stood up and headed to the Fenrir. This was going to be a long night.

It was way past midnight. The bar had cleared out and closed up for a while now. From the movements he could hear around the place, Kadaj was sure everyone had gone to bed. He was still waiting for Niisan. Cloud hadn't called or left a note. He was starting to get worried again. Maybe Niisan had left for real this time. _Nah, Niisan promised. Sort of anyway._ He ran his hand through his shoulder length hair and wandered if it'll ever grow to be as long as Yazoo. He missed them, both of them. Kadaj missed Yazoo's seemingly cold demeanour and Loz's cry baby act.

Just like him, they all hid behind something, put up a smoke screen to try and hide their own pain. He knew there was more chance of them dead than alive. Without JENOVA, they had lost the connection. He couldn't feel their presence in this world or the next. He touched the old Polaroid in his hands, it was the only image showing the three brothers together. Taken by some tourist when they had first arrived in the world. Loz had simply plucked the photo from its original owner and growled. Yazoo complained he looked like a girl and Loz said he looked like a monkey. But Kadaj had kept the photo, he wasn't sure why he did it in the first place but was glad he did it now.

He heard familiar footsteps on the staircase. _Niisan._ But the footsteps were quieter today. Kadaj cocked his head to one side and focused on the sound. _It's Niisan, I'm sure._ The door inched open and revealed spikes of blonde hair. Kadaj was about to jump up and call out when he saw the finger on Niisan's lips.

He stood and looked unsure of himself. Cloud crossed the room and whispered.

"We're leaving. Pack what you need."

"Niisan?" the sensation of Cloud's breath in his ear caused something to happen. He couldn't pinpoint the feeling but it made the hair stand on the back of his neck.

"It'll be okay. We just need to leave before anyone finds out." Cloud held him by the shoulders and smiled. A small smile that only pulled the corners of his mouth up but that's how Niisan smiled.

Kadaj could only nod like a dumb child, stunned for a minute before gathering his wits about him. There wasn't much to pack, Souba, the photo, his older armour, _at least they didn't cut it into pieces_, and that's it. All the clothes he wore belonged to Niisan so there wasn't really anything to pack.

Cloud stuffed all the clothes he could fit in the black duffel back he had used for long deliveries. He didn't have much to pack either. Just enough changes of clothes for both of them, whatever they didn't have could be bought in Costa del Sol. _At least gil won't be a problem._ None of them had realised that when Cloud bought the Shinra Mansion, he also managed to inherit a secret safe hidden in the basement. They had only found it after Barrett got drunk and blew a hole in the wall with his gun arm. They were going to give all the money to Reeve for his WRO project but the business man had insisted on leaving a portion of money in the safe for holiday expenses.

He zipped up the bag and pushed open the small window facing the street. It was too risky to go down the stairs carrying things, they might accidentally wake someone up. Cloud hopped out the window first, followed by Kadaj and led the boy to the corner where he parked Fenrir. He looked at the small wooden bar a last time and muttered a goodbye. He felt like a scumbag doing the disappearing act on one of the closest friend he had. _You have to._ Thought Cloud, trying to convince himself.

"Aren't we going to say goodbye? To Tifa." Cloud had suspected that Kadaj was taking a liking to Tifa. _Who couldn't!_

"She'll…understand." He secured the back on the back of the large motorcycle and hopped on. Kadaj jumped on behind him and wrapped his arms tightly around his waist. Fenrir started with a roar, the wheels spun on the ground before taking off into the night. _Good night, Tifa, and goodbye. _He sent his final farewell and headed for Junon.

Tifa stood in the front door of her bar. She watched as her friends waved their goodbye and headed for the Sierra. Marlene and Denzel had kissed her on the cheeks and told her they'll be back soon. Nanaki had licked her and told her to visit Cosmo. Barrett and Cid did the whole older brother thing and told her to stay safe and Cait Sith was a robot.

Cloud hadn't sent them off. She heard him come in early this morning and figured he'd be tired. Besides, they were only a call away. Brushing her hair back, Tifa took the stairs, she wanted to check on Cloud and tell him everyone's left.

The door, (Cloud and Kadaj's, Tifa had put a cot in the room after Cloud almost broke his neck when he slept on the chair) inched open. The room was empty.

Stunned and unsure of what was happening, Tifa stood wide-eyed in the doorway and stared at the empty beds. She took a step into the empty room and blinked. No, the room was still empty. A piece of paper on the night table caught her eyes. Her hands shook as she unfolded the letter.

_Tifa,_

_I had to go. I don't know when we'll be back. Will be in touch. Thankyou for everything._

_Cloud._

Her knees gave up and she crumbled to the floor between the beds. Hot tears burned their way down her cheeks, hushed sobs echoed through the room. She had promised once never to cry again but she let herself now. All the tears that had been accumulating through the years came in a rush. Letting the letter fall onto the floor, Tifa covered her face. She had lost him in the end. He had stayed with her after everything they had gone through but now she knew why. She had been the one who desperately tried to hold on to an illusion. They could never be a family and she understood now. In the end, Cloud was just like his name. They never stay in the same place for long.

Tifa kept sobbing, even after her tears had dried up, she kept sobbing weakly in her arm. Her throat raw and her eyes stung. Unsure of how long she stayed on the floor, Tifa finally pulled herself off the ground. She curled up in Cloud's bed and fell asleep, she could still smell him on the sheets.


	6. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: Do not own the following characters. **

**Chapter Warning: Still nothing! Sorry if you're waiting for something though.  
**

**Chapter 5: Beginnings Anew.**

Kadaj had never been to the ocean or sailed on it in a boat. They had taken the passage to Costa del Sol from Junon and avoided meeting Reeve at all cost. He breathed in the salty air and laughed. The wind blew his hair off his neck staining his pale flesh with salted water. He laughed again out of sheer joy. Behind him, Cloud approached quietly and stood a short distance away. He remembers the last time they had caught a boat to cross the ocean. They'd been tracking Sephiroth then, this boat ride didn't bring back good memories but Kadaj's laughter gave him a warm feeling.

The boy turned around and faced his Niisan. Kadaj was suddenly taken back by how good Cloud actually looked. The sun was reflecting off his golden hair throwing a halo of light around him. In the midday sun, you could hardly tell his eyes were glowing. The blue ponds sparkled, framed by delicate features and covered by smooth white skin. His face was faintly marked by a few freckles and an almost invisible scar across his right brow where Yazoo had shot him.

Kadaj found himself lost, consumed by the vision in front of him. Niisan reminded him of the stone angel near 7th Heaven. Not the girl part but the expression that exuded from the blue eyes. Regret, guilt, pity and sadness. He walked over and held Cloud in a tight embrace. He heard his brother's heartbeat against his head. Steady, even and strong. His own heart were going million miles an hour as his hug was returned.

Cloud placed his chin on the silver hair and hugged the slender body. He knew Tifa would be calling his phone right about now but he didn't tell her he had lost it. He'd call her, he promised, when he got to Costa del Sol. Until then, there was nothing he can do. They would be arriving in a few hours. Cloud released himself from the hug and looked at the devil child with the face of a cherub.

"I'll be in the cabin. We'll be arriving soon. Don't fall off the boat." He brushed a speck of salt from the soft cheek and smiled.

"Niisan, you worry too much about me. I won't fall in." The boy smiled right back, flashing his white teeth and green eyes. _Did he just wink at me?_ Cloud wondered absently as he made his way back to his cabin. He hadn't slept in two days already and decided to catch some shut eye until they docked.

Costa del Sol was hot. Even in the afternoon sun. Cloud took Kadaj by the hand and waded through the crowds. The resort town was buzzing with life even in the post-meteor world. The majority of the crowds were clad in bikinis, board shorts and the occasional speedo. Kadaj gapped open-mouthed at the scantily clad populations and looked at Cloud. _I wonder how Niisan would look in shorts and nothing else._ An image shimmered into his head but Kadaj killed it before it could be fully visualised.

They stopped in front of a set of oak doors. Cloud fished around the black bag before pulling out a key attached to a Shinra label. He stared at the reddish logo.

"This place used to belong to Shinra until we bought it two years ago. Don't worry, there's nothing Shinra about it now." Cloud patted him on the back assuredly and opened the door. The place was surprisingly clean after being unused for so long. But then Cloud remembered someone cleaned the place once a week. The walls were furbished with dark timber and high ceiling leaving it slightly dark but very cool.

Kadaj wandered through the hall and looked in each single room until he arrived at the balcony overlooking the ocean. He had liked the boat ride and was glad he could feel the same salty wind on his face. It was such a change to Edge, Kadaj was starting to like the place already. _Maybe I'll even go to the beach._

He ran back down the hall and found Cloud in one of the rooms. He came up from behind and wrapped his arms around the familiar body.

"I love this place, Niisan!"

"Well… good. I'm glad you like it…" Cloud was feeling uncomfortable. It felt like a lover's embrace. One he had share with Him a long time ago. He wiggled gently and pulled away, hoping Kadaj didn't pick up on the discomfort.

"I need to go and do something. Can you stay here?" Cloud hadn't counted on Kadaj suddenly stomping his feet and pouting like he did often these days.

"Why do you always go somewhere without me? You never tell me where you're going or when you'll be back. What if you got hurt and I won't even know where you might be." Kadaj thought about the chances of someone hurting Cloud. He could almost laugh at the image of a beaten-up Niisan. But that didn't stop him from worrying.

"I was just going to call Tifa, you can come if you want." He replied, noticing the hurt flicking in green cat eyes.

"Oh." Kadaj felt at a loss for words. He over-reacted for nothing. _Dammit! Should have saved it for later._ "Well, good. I'm going to go with you." He nodded his head for emphasis and marched out the front door. Cloud shook his head and followed. Tifa isn't going to like this.

-"Cloud!"- Tifa's voice exploded over the phone lines. He furrowed his brows and prepared for a lecture.

"Tifa. It's me." The line was silent. She didn't say anything but Cloud thought he heard a sob.

"Tifa?"

-"Are you okay?"- He hated himself, he wanted her to be angry but she wasn't, she sounded hurt and alone.

"Yeah. We're okay." He scanned the street where he was making the call from, keeping an eye from the silver-haired boy who was looking around the various shops.

-"Will you ever come home?"- Tifa hadn't asked where they were or when they'll come home. She had only wanted to know if they ever will. _Cloud you moron._ He told himself.

"Yeah, eventually I guess. I don't know how long we'll be staying away. I'm sorry for not telling you." He glanced around the street again and realised he couldn't see Kadaj anymore. Cloud muttered a curse under his breath,

"Tifa, I've got to go. I'll call you in a few days."

-"Cloud! Wait…"- he had hung up on her and began half running to the last place he saw him at. The vender pointed the way to a clothing store across the street, saying the boy had wandered in there. Cloud pushed through the crowds and rushed into the shop. There in the change rooms, stood his problem case. Wearing nothing but a pair of surf shorts and looking at himself in the floor length mirror.

Kadaj admired his new look in the mirror. He ran his finger over the small scar on his chest. Niisan had given him that, when he was Him, but then Niisan saved him. Cloud watched silently as the boy with a man's body turned in front of him. It was undeniable that Kadaj reminded Cloud of Him, but he never realised how much resemblance there was until now. Though shorter, Kadaj had the same skin tone, body structure and muscle tone. His taunt body was smooth and hairless like His, tapering down at the waist to slender hips before widening out slightly at the buttocks.

Cloud pushed the thought out his head and called out.

"Kadaj!"

"Niisan! You like this, ne?"


	7. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: No own... **

**Chapter Warning: Yes! And Again, nothing to warn about. By the way, just in case you didn't understand, all the Him, with the captial H is referring to a certain long haired crazy person we all love.  
**

**Chapter 6: It's Enough to Know You're Okay.**

Vincent narrowed his eyes as he arrived at the front door of 7th Heaven. He saw the lights on inside but a note stuck on the door indicated it was closed until further notice. He made a promise to Cloud and he was keeping it. Without knocking, Vincent pushed the doors open, noticing they weren't locked. Tifa was slumped over the bar with a half empty bottle of clear liquid next to her. He could smell the alcohol.

She stirred and pull her head off the counter.

"We're closed." She murmured and dropped her head back down. He walked over, lifted her up and carried her to her room. He didn't want to but knew he should stay the night and keep an eye on her. Tifa had struggled weakly against him but quietened down and fell into a dreamless sleep.

She woke at the first light and groaned. Her head was hurting from all the drinking she's been doing over the last few days. Out the corner of her eye, Tifa saw the crimson cape then the blood eyes that was watching her. _Vincent._ Tifa sat up weakly and looked at mystery man.

"You shouldn't drink so much."

"Well you shouldn't be so much of a social recluse." She retorted but was suddenly ashamed of her reply. Vincent didn't need her lecturing. He stood up, unfazed by her comment and headed for the door.

"You know where he is, don't you!" He stopped and half turned his head. Tifa was looking worn and pale but hurt was the most prominent.

"Does that really matter?"

"Yes, it does! Tell me where he's gone."

"I can't."

"Tell me Vincent. I just need to know." Vincent Valentine looked hard into the girl in front of him. He knew the devotion she had for Cloud, it was the same devotion he had once for Lucretia. He couldn't leave her not knowing. Besides, he never promised Cloud not to tell her where he was.

"He's in Costa del Sol. You should get some sleep." He left without turning around again. He could hear her sobbing quietly in the room.

"Niisan." Kadaj shook the sleeping body gently. He didn't like being away from Cloud, especially not at night. He didn't want to dream about her. Cloud stirred and woke. He was a light sleeper, a habit developed since the old days as a Shinra grunt.

"Nightmares again?"

"Can I sleep with you tonight?" Kadaj pleaded. Cloud debated in his head but he was too tired to bother and shifted to the side of the bed. Kadaj crawled in, wearing the same old shorts he had been given from day one and curled up close to him. _Don't think, just sleep._ Cloud told himself, this was bringing back too much memories.

"Ne, Niisan. Can I ask you a question?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"Did you… You loved Him, didn't you?" Cloud blinked away the sleep and processed the question. Kadaj was referring to Him, wasn't he. So did he? He was sure about the answer at some point but too much has happened to make him doubt. No, he never doubted his own feelings, he was only doubting His feeling about himself.

"Yes. I did, once."

"Do I remind you of Him?"

"You're you, Kadaj. He was someone else. Don't think about it, just sleep." Cloud turned around and closed his eyes. But sleep wasn't forthcoming anymore. His thoughts were filled with His face and His touch. _Get it out of your head, Cloud._

They've been here for three days and Costa del Sol was good. Kadaj had taken on a sudden liking for buying things. Shopping was tiring as it is, but trailing behind a hyperactive brat prone to psychotic episodes were even worse. But Cloud allowed himself to be dragged around the busy shopping strip, it was time for them to stop looking like wannabe twins.

Anyway, the tiring trips to the shops allowed him to sleep without the endless dreams. He woke up groggily and rubbed his eyes. They had moved another bed into his room, Kadaj insisted on sleeping in the same room as him, well the same bed actually, but Cloud couldn't handle the idea at the moment.

A loud knock came from the front door. He looked around the room, Kadaj must have gone out and forgot to take the keys. He rubbed his face and padded to the front door.

"Haven't you learned to take the keys yet?" he said as he opened up the door. Tifa, not his brat, stood in front of him. She had dark circles under red eyes, carrying a bag in her hand.

"Tifa." He muttered, almost to himself. She didn't say a word. Tifa dropped her bag and pulled him into a hug. He felt the warmth of her tears on his neck, her body shuddered in silent sobs. He asked her to forgive him in his mind and knew she would regardless. Tifa pulled away and smiled through her tears.

"I just needed to know if you were okay. To see for myself." She wiped at the tears on her face and smiled again.

"Tifa."

"I can see you're okay. That's good, I just wanted to see." She picked up her bag and took a step back.

"Goodbye, Cloud."

"Tifa." She turned and stepped into the sun. Her thick brown hair shone in the bright light.

"Tifa! Wait!" Cloud reached out and pulled her back.

"I'm sorry I didn't say goodbye. But I'm not running away." She looked at him and nodded.

"I know."

"Stay, at least for tonight." Tifa hesitated, looking at her shoes. Behind her, Kadaj bounced up with an armful of bags. He stopped when he saw her standing at the door and shuffled across.

"Tifa?" She turned around and smiled. Kadaj could see the fresh tears on her cheeks.

"Tifa." Niisan was pleading. Had it been any other time, Kadaj would have stared at his Niisan's bare chest but somehow, it didn't feel right with Tifa standing right there. He knew she had come for the longing she felt inside. _Niisan wants her to stay. It'll make him happy._ He grabbed her bag and pushed her into the house.


	8. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: Same as the previous mindless droning.**

**Chapter Warning: Guess what? I actually have something to warn about. Now this is between Tifa and Cloud, don't be offended, it's all for the sake of creativity. I wouldn't say it's too graphic but if anything in this sector offends you, turn back NOW! Also, not to report me and review me...pls?  
**

**  
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**Chapter 7: Granted Wishes and Shattered Dreams.**

Tifa stood outside his door. She raised her hand to knock but drew back and turned the handle. Kadaj had opted to sleep in his own room tonight and Cloud lay sprawled over the sheets asleep. She crept in and kneeled down beside his bed like she had done once before.

"Do you love me?" she had asked him the same thing before, while he was sleeping just as he was now.

"Do you want to come home to me?" He didn't stir.

Gently, Tifa lifted the sheets and laid down facing him. She brushed a rogue spike from his face and watched as the blue eyes snapped open. They widened as he focused on her face and began to pull back, his lips opened to say something.

Tifa pushed her face closer and hushed him with her lips. She kissed him gently feeling his lips moving against hers. Her heart pounded in her chest and heat brewed in her stomach. She opened her lips and felt his tongue brushing across her mouth before it pushed softly, seeking for permission. Their tongues twisted and mingled with each other, exploring every ridge and curve of the new found terrain.

With a strong pull, Cloud rolled her on top of his thighs and held her by her hips. She tightened her legs against him and looked into the dark blue eyes, glowing a little stronger from their contact. Tifa leaned down and kissed him again, harder and more demanding this time. His arms moved over her back and reached under the thin folds of her night dress. She sat up and pulled the dress off, revealing her bare breasts. His hands moved down her sides and grasped her strong thighs. Tifa wondered how he managed to keep his hands so soft.

Their slick bodies glided over each other, the heat burning under their skins. Cloud moaned into her mouth and brushed her cheeks. She hovered over him and breathed in the scent of her desires. He drew back suddenly, doubt filled his eyes. She smiled and touched his face and whispered it was okay. Tifa shifted lower, running her hands over his chest and kissed the feint scars. With nimble fingers, she unbuttoned his pants, pulled them off and caressed his hardness that she had long wished to take inside.

He shuddered under her touch and lifted her up. Cloud looked unsure and petitioned to her again. She answered with a nod and lowered herself, feeling the stiff heat enter and filling the empty void. Her thighs tensed as she adjusted to his width before moving her hips along the shaft. Tifa threw her head back and moan into the empty room. The world around her melted away leaving only the two of them grinding to the sound of their beating hearts. Her fingers clawed at his smooth chest feeling tremors under the skin.

Cloud kept his eyes on her throat, watching the rise and fall of her ample chest with every movement of his thrust. He pushed his body off the bed and planted his hungry mouth over the pale flesh, kissing and biting her soft neck while whispering words of need and want. Her hands ran through his unkempt hair, her fingers tangled and lost in the streaks of sunshine. She pulled him to her, begging for him to feel every part of her yearning body. His vision glazed over and something snapped inside, breaking the control he had spent years developing.

He pulled her head down and crushed their mouth together, taking in her taste while she responded with equal force. Her short nails dug into the skin on his back, drawing a hiss from his throat that only added to the hunger. He felt the sweat running down the curve of her body, gathering momentarily on the small of her back before trailing off between his legs soaking the sheets underneath.

This is what he wanted, Tifa, in his arms and him inside her. Pushing and shifting against her softness, searching for the place they both wanted to be. She moaned again, almost a hushed cry when he finally found what she had desired. Tightening his hold, Cloud rolled her over and pinned her taunt body underneath him. Her lips were moving, muttering something he couldn't hear over the pounding of blood in his ears.

Rich, dark locks flattened itself over her sweaty forehead, he brushed it away to reveal her mesmerising liquid chocolate. He lifted her arms off his back and pulled them over her head. She relinquished her hold without struggle and allowed him to place them as he saw fit. Cloud ran his hands down her arms and kissed her beckoning lips. Their tongues moving in time with their hips.

Tifa felt her body melt under his touch. Years of watching him from afar ridden with guilt and loss tore at her heart. She wanted to make it all better for him but never knew what to say. Somewhere, in the back of her mind, Tifa silently promised she would always be there regardless of where his life might lead him. The heat was unbearable now, Cloud quickened his pace, moving deeper with every thrust. Tifa tensed and buckled with the change of rhythm. She closed her eyes, feeling only their bodies against each other.

Stars swam across his vision. Cloud felt his body taken over by something primitive. Ferocious and uncontrollable desiring nothing else but to consume him in lust. He gave in to it willingly, grasping his sweaty fingers to the headboard of the bed and crushed his body against hers over and over again. Waves of pleasure descended like the tumbling sea.

In a moment of pure bliss, the stars disappeared opening to the heavens above shedding divine light over their stiffened bodies. Tifa arched her back and cried out his name. Liquid heat poured into her body, burning away her loneliness for just a split of a second. He closed his mouth over hers and thrusted a few more times before dropping onto her limply.

His hands snaked under her arched back and pulled her in his arms. She tasted the salty film of sweat on her tongue as he gently pulled away and dropped beside her. Her lungs burned with every breath she took, her body sated and cooled with the aftermath of their labour. He pulled her head onto his chest and wrapped his arms around her firm body.

He didn't say anything and Tifa didn't want him to. They laid together for an eternity before fatigue drew him into sleep. But Tifa couldn't, she laid awake listening to his slowing heart beat.

"I love you, Cloud." She whispered knowing he wouldn't hear before falling asleep in his arms.

The first light of Costa del Sol filtered through the drawn curtains, it reached out and touched her with its ethereal fingers. Tifa woke to the gentle light, her head still pillowed on his chest. Gingerly, she sat up, careful not to disturb her sleeping angel with golden hair. Tifa took a moment to study his features, wishing she could see the blue eyes. But Cloud was a light sleeper and she didn't want him to wake up.

She rolled off the bed and stood up. What she was about to do hit her with pang, making her unwilling to proceed. Nevertheless, Tifa gathered up her discard clothes and pull them on hastily, she glanced at him one last time and left the room. In the still dim hallway, Tifa perked up her ears and listened for movement from the room Kadaj would be sleeping in. She padded softly on the wooden floors and dressed quietly.

At the front door, Tifa smiled to herself. Last night seemed like a distant memory but it still warmed her just remembering. _I'll always be here._ She had promised him that last night and she always kept her promise. The streets barely stirred and she stepped out the door. She knew Cloud loved her, but it will always be love between friends. Last night didn't change that fact, it was her will that it happened. Swallowing the hard lump of separation, Tifa headed towards the port, making her way back to 7th Heaven.

Cloud was looking at the ceiling, he had been awake since Tifa had left. He didn't know what to do, but asking her stay was not it. He didn't love her the way he had love Him, what they had last night was a moment of passion that was now lingering guilt. Did he use her? He was sure he hadn't but it still felt as though he did. He had hurt her again. This time by doing something.

He dragged himself out of bed and put on some board shorts Kadaj had went out and bought for him. The weather was too hot for his usual attire but the shorts were making him feel out of place. The room smelled like Tifa, but it would soon fade away. She had left, he wondered if it would have been better for Tifa if she never stayed.

Kadaj was dreaming. He was always plagued by nightmare when he wasn't be Niisan. She always came to him when he was alone. Her high shrieking laughter rang through his ears cutting into his mind. He cried out and tried to shut her off, but JENOVA clung to her children. She whispered words of endearment but he shielded himself by visualising Niisan. Her tone turned harsh and scolded him for loving a traitor. But Kadaj wouldn't hear her. She was losing her hold on him just like she once lost Cloud.

Voices drowned out his own thoughts and sprayed his mind with temptation of power. _Niisan. Help me!_ He had cried out. But this was a dream, Niisan couldn't help him, Niisan could only keep the dreams away. He turned and faced her, armed with Souba which had been a gift from JENOVA. Her fingers reached out and beckoned him to her embrace.

Kadaj stepped forward, letting her draw him in. She closed around him and told him he was her favourite. _Stop Mother, I'm not your puppet anymore!_ He told her and watched as the motherly façade faded and turned into a alien scowl. He plunged Souba into her heart and twisted the blade, opening the wound letting the blood ooze out. She withered and tried to stop the steady stream, each drop separating her further from her vessel.

_Kadaj_. She called his name, the name he had chosen himself. _I am my own. Just like Niisan._ He glared at her and watched her fade from view. It felt lighter now, a burden lifted, hopefully, forever.


End file.
